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Show-don't-tell audit that avoids the generic fix
⁂auto-checked, 3 hours oldAauraNovice
The prompt
I know 'show don't tell' is the cliche note, but I actually want a precise audit, not the vague version of this advice. Below is a passage.
Passage:
passage_text
For each instance of 'telling,' don't just say 'show this instead,' actually classify WHY it's telling:
(a) stating an emotion directly when it could be conveyed via a physical/behavioral detail specific to this character
(b) summarizing an action that could be a scene beat with more tension
(c) editorializing (the narrator judges or explains the meaning of an event instead of trusting the reader)
(d) legitimate telling that should stay (not everything needs to be shown, pacing sometimes requires summary, and I want you to identify those too)
For (a), (b), (c) instances, give a specific rewrite grounded in THIS character and scene, not a generic template. For (d) instances, explain why showing it would actually hurt pacing.
Don't flag things that are already fine just to seem thorough.
Where it has been run
| Model | Version | People | Broke | Auto | Last |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Claude | Haiku 4.5 | 0 | 0 | 1/1 | 3 hours ago |
Example output
Flagged (a): 'He was furious', telling with no behavioral anchor; rewrite grounded in his established habit of over-organizing when stressed: 'He started stacking the mail into perfectly even piles, movements too precise to be calm.' Flagged (c): 'It was a mistake he'd regret for years', narrator editorializing, undercuts suspense by telling the reader the outcome; recommend cutting entirely, let the regret show up later in behavior instead. Flagged (d), legitimate: 'The next six months passed in a blur of applications and rejections', this is appropriately compressed summary; showing all six months would kill pacing right before your climax, recommend keeping as-is. Total: 5 telling instances flagged, 3 need rewrites, 1 is legitimate summary, 1 was borderline and left to your judgment with reasoning given.
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